Remember when I told you in my first post, that the wellness and weight loss industry was a $225 Billion industry in 2021? Well, when you have that kind of cash flow, you have the power to influence the definitions of things. That is exactly what has happened over the years when it comes to so-called "Self-Care". You have seen the commercials, magazine ads, Instagram posts etc. with people doing crazy things and calling it “self-care”. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but self-care is not binge-watching reality tv, or calling in sick to work so you can sleep in and eat junk food.
Close your eyes and picture what “self-care” means to you.
Are you at brunch having donuts and drinking 3 mimosas after sleeping all morning?
Are you sitting on your couch with a mountain of ketchup chips, Oreo cookies and watching the newest season of Selling Sunset?
Are you In your sweats for the entire day watching (and maybe practicing) the latest TikTok videos?
Okay, my turn... What self-care USED to mean to me was a glass of wine (...or 3..) in the bubble bath followed by a bowl of popcorn and a trashy reality tv show that I would binge watch
for 2-3 hours. I would snap a couple of selfies for the gram because is it even self-care if everyone doesn’t know about it (#selfcaresunday right?). I was under the misguided impression that self-care was supposed to be ultra-relaxing and basically meant that I would schedule time in my life to do absolutely nothing. Or actually, not nothing... eat bad food and melt my brain with tv that is useless. So in other words, Self care meant un-doing all of the hard work I did all week actually taking care of myself.
If this sounds like you, that is okay! Believe me that I still schedule time on Sundays to have my wine in the bubble bath. And you best believe that I go all out. There is spa music, there are about 50 candles, there are Epsom salts, there are bubbles. And Zack is banished to the garage so there is no noise going on in the house. It is glorious. And yes, it is self-care. I just don’t follow it up with the popcorn and reality tv anymore. While there is room for that in a healthy lifestyle (#Balance am I right!?), it is not self-care. Instead, I try to get a head start on making my list of things I want to accomplish in the coming week and try to get my head in a happy space, so I am ready to take on a new week!
According to oxford dictionary the true definition of self-care:
"the act of caring for yourself, for example by eating and sleeping well, taking exercise and getting help so that you do not become ill. "
What this definition really means to me is that self-care is actually work. And it is pretty busy stuff! Caring for your personal hygiene, creating a sleep routine, making time to exercise, and reaching out for help when you need it is just not sexy. So no wonder all of those "health" companies were so easily able to get us on board with changing it into binge eating cookies and drinking wine!
My challenge to you this week is to re-define the new age definition of self-care and what it means to you. I do this with all my clients. We want to make a list of about 10 things that you can choose from that are self-care. These are things that you can schedule into your week to help you to care for yourself. I usually ask my clients to spend a minimum of 12 hours/ week doing things to take care of themselves. now before you scoff at me and tell me that you couldn't possibly make the time to carve out 12 hours for yourself, there are 168 hours in each week. 12 hours is not a big commitment. However, if you are used to being the super-mom/wife/ dad/ friend/employee etc. this will feel very foreign and I promise, you will feel guilty at first.
So remember our motto, you don't have to be perfect, you just have to start taking small steps. Maybe start with writing down/ keeping track of how much self-care you are doing each week currently, and start adding in an extra 30 minutes each week until you have hit your 12 hours.
Here is a basic list of things that I do for self-care:
1- Take a Bath with Epsom salts, Candles, Spa music & Visualize
2- Go for a walk
3- Workout
4- Schedule health care appointments (Doctor, Dentist, Therapy, Physio etc.)
5- Set a sleep schedule on my phone and follow a bedtime routine
6- Meal Prep my lunches and snacks for the week
7- Eat a healthy breakfast
8- Skin care routine
9- Do Yoga/ Meditation
10- Drink 72 oz water each day minimum
So, a typical week for myself care might look like this:
- Workout/ Run: Monday, Thursday (1.5 Hours)
- Yoga: Tuesday, Friday (1.5 Hours)
- Physio Exercises: Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Sunday (1 Hour)
- Drinking my water every single day (I count this as 1 Hour)
- Health Care appointments: Monday therapy, Wednesday physio (2 Hours)
- Walk: Wednesday, Saturday (1 Hour)
- Meal Prep: Sunday (1.5 Hours)
- Bath: Sunday (1 Hour)
- Pack Lunches including breakfast: Monday- Friday (30 Minutes)
- Skin Care: Sunday after Bath: 15 Minutes
- Establish Bedtime Routine: 45 Minutes
Now this is just an example of some things I might do in a week that are on my list for self-care. Each and every week is different and your week could look completely different from mine. In fact, I would expect it to because your life is completely different! The point is, that we all need to start looking at self-care a little differently in order to find that balance we all crave. You don’t have to give up your favourite reality tv show, just maybe watch it while you are on the treadmill.
You don’t realize how bad you feel, until you feel better. I have seen it time and time again and have even experienced this firsthand. I promise you that if you start scheduling time for yourself, you will find you are able to be more productive, more present and more you! You don’t have to be perfect; you just have to try.
<3 Bre
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